The Celebration
of the
Sacrament of Marriage
Marriage Preparation
Guidelines for
St. Brigid Parish
845 East Broadway
And
Gate of Heaven Parish
The greatest of these is
love
Dear Friends:
Marriage at the Saint Brigid and Gate of Heaven
Parish Community is more than the celebration of a couple's love for each
other. While the Church rejoices in your
love for one another, we also recognize that celebrating your Wedding in the
Catholic Church presupposes your connection with God in faith and with the
Church. The Sacrament of Marriage in the
Church solemnizes Marriage in the context of prayer. Great care is taken to see that the prayer
for this special moment is reverent, graceful, beautiful
and open to the movement of God's Spirit among us. The celebration of the Sacrament of Marriage
is incomplete unless it is filled with song, with prayerful gestures and with
silence in which we hear the voice of God in our lives. In this spirit, St. Brigid and Gate of Heaven
Parishes provide the following guidelines so that this time of joy will not
only be an experience filled with happiness, but also one that expresses faith
and reverence in God, in whose love we have been created.
Couples seeking marriage at our parish must be a registered parishioner and have a legal permanent address in South Boston, MA 02127.
Preparation for Marriage
1. Meetings with Priest:
This first contact and meeting will enable the
priest and couple to get acquainted.
Subsequent meetings are part of the preparation for marriage. As the wedding date draws near, attention
will shift to planning the wedding liturgy.
2. Marriage Preparation
(Pre-Cana) Program:
For your Pre-Cana
program there are two options: The Marriage Preparation offered by St. Brigid
and Gate of Heaven Parishes and held once a year or the program sponsored by
the Archdiocese of Boston. A list of
these programs can be obtained from the priest with whom you are speaking or on
the internet at www.rcab.org.
It is required that you attend one of the Marriage
Preparation Programs before being married.
It is suggested that you register early to be sure a spot is reserved
for you. We also suggest that you attend
the Pre-Cana Marriage Preparation Program soon after
your first meeting with the priest.
Planning Your Wedding
1. Mass or Ceremony?
A nuptial Mass is the most appropriate celebration
as you begin your married life. We
highly recommend this form of marriage celebration for all engaged Catholic
couples. There are certain circumstances, however, when a ceremony would be
more appropriate. You should make your
decision in consultation with the priest who is assisting in the preparation
for your marriage.
You might want to consider the
following:
a.
What is our relationship to the Sunday Eucharist? Have been away from the community's
prayer? Have committed ourselves to
returning?
b. If one of you is
not in communion with the Roman Catholic Church (and so will be unable to share
Holy Communion if the wedding is celebrated during Mass), you may want to
consider what this means for you and your families. Do you want to include something in this
celebration in which only one of you will be able to take part?
c. Who will your
guests be? If many of your guests are
from outside the Catholic community, you may want to consider celebrating your
wedding within a ceremony. If many are
weekly participants in the Eucharist, a ceremony may cause confusion with their
interpretation of the usual celebration of the Sacrament of Marriage.
Above all, be
open and honest with the priest with whom you are preparing your wedding and
make the decision which will provide the best context for prayer and
celebration.
2. Scheduling the time of
the celebration:
Weddings are scheduled
with respect to the couple's wishes and the availability of the church building
and parish ministers. Weddings are
usually scheduled on Saturdays from 11:00 a.m. through 2:00 p.m. and at 5:30
p.m. Weddings are scheduled on Sundays
from 2:00 p.m. through 4:00 p.m.
3. Music:
Music is an integral part of the celebration of
the sacrament of
marriage. The music you select must be prayerful and in
keeping with the liturgy of the occasion.
The choice must always be consistent with the Church's understanding of
worship. Popular songs, even those with
great sentimental value for the couple, have their rightful place at the
reception and not at the celebration of the Sacrament. The priest can assist you in choosing
appropriate music for your Wedding. Our Parish Music Director/Organist, Carolyn
Martin, is available to assist in the planning of your celebration. Please contact her regarding your music and
choice of soloist at least two months prior to your wedding. At this time we have three soloists—Felecia
Plunkett, Ann Marie Powers, Janet O’Leary — that are available for singing at
Weddings. These soloists sing at the
Masses on the weekends, so you can arrange to listen to them at that time. The fee for the organist/music director is
$175 and the fee for the soloist is $150. These fees are to be paid
directly to the singer and musician and is due in the Parish Office no
later than 15 days prior to the date of your wedding. Please note that our organist must be paid
even if you schedule an organist from outside the parish. Guest musicians (trumpeter, violinist,
etc.) are welcome, but arrangements must be made through the music director.
4. Flowers/Florist:
Flowers may be placed in the sanctuary on the back
altar area.
Flowers are not placed on the altar itself. An aisle runner is not
necessary for the celebration of
your marriage, but if you choose to use one, the florist usually provides a white aisle
runner. Often during the reception of
Communion the aisle runner can pose a risk to your guests walking back and
forth. Please take this into consideration
before making arrangements. The church aisle 120 feet.
The florist is responsible for placing the flowers in the sanctuary and
setting up the aisle runner. Please
be certain that your florist place the flowers/aisle runner/bows etc. in their
appropriate spots and not leave these items in the Church. The florist should prepare the Church 30-45
minutes before the celebration. Florists
should also be aware of the Parish Mass schedule, especially the 4:00 PM on
Saturday. We do ask that you leave the flowers on the altar for the continued
enrichment of our sanctuary and the enjoyment of your fellow parishioners. In keeping with the norms of the
5. Photography:
The Liturgy during which you celebrate your
marriage is a sacred moment of rejoicing in prayer, song and gesture. While we understand your desire to record
this moment, we ask that you observe the following guidelines so that the
sacred joy of this day will be preserved.
1.
Both professional photographers and video technicians are welcome at our
parish. We ask that only one
Photographer and one Video Technician be employed during the
ceremony. Any relatives or friends
taking pictures should remain in their seats.
2.
Video-photographers are not permitted to roam about the Church once the liturgy
has begun. Video Cameras must remain
on a tripod in one of the side aisles once the bride reaches the altar
until the final blessing.
3.
Only the lighting already available in the Church may be used. No additional lighting may be brought into
the Church or used with a video camera.
Flash Photography is permitted.
4.
Photographers and video photographers should consult with the priest before the
service begins concerning any restrictions that may apply. Under no circumstances are videographers or photographers allowed in the altar
sanctuary.
5. These policies provide for ample time to take photos during the
ceremony. If you think that additional
time for pictures inside the church is needed following the ceremony, please
speak with the priest prior to your wedding date.
6. "Together for
Life" Booklet:
The priest will provide you with a booklet Together
for Life by Joseph M. Champlin to help you plan your
Wedding Mass/Ceremony. Within this
booklet you will find a number of choices of prayers, readings, vows, etc. that
you may select for your wedding. A handy
pull-out selection sheet is found at the end of the booklet to be filled out
with your choices and presented at the parish office no later than 15 days
before your wedding date, along with the other paperwork and donations.
7. Fees and Offerings to
the Parish:
The offering to the Parish is usually in
proportion to the amount spent on the wedding.
The offering for the Parish is $500 which is required in two payments 1.) $250
deposit within 30 days of arranging the wedding (this secures your date) and
2.) $250 due 15 days prior to the date of your wedding. This amount may be reduced if you are
currently contributing to the parish on a regular basis — please consult the priest that is
celebrating your wedding regarding this reduction. The donation goes to the maintenance, heat,
electricity costs of the parish. This donation is not for the priest. If you wish to show your appreciation for
the time and effort made by the priest in assisting you to prepare for this
day, you may do so at your discretion.
Our wedding coordinator, Stephen Fahrig, assists you in planning your
celebration and will direct your rehearsal and be present for the start of your
Nuptial Mass or ceremony. The fee for
the wedding coordinator is $75. It is
customary to a give a gift to the two altar servers assigned to your
wedding. The recommended offering is a
minimum of $10 each.
8. Documents Needed:
A. Church Documents
If you are a Catholic: you will need a copy of
your Baptismal
certificate and Confirmation
certificate sent by mail from the parish of origin to our Parish in care of the
priest who is witnessing your marriage.
These should be newly furnished (dated within six months of your
Marriage) by the parish in which the sacrament was celebrated. If you are a non-Catholic Christian: you
will need a copy of your Baptismal certificate.
This should be a newly furnished document by the Church in which you
were baptized.
B. Civil Documents:
You must obtain a marriage license at any town or
city hall in
apply for this license from 60 days
before your wedding date. Please present
your license to the parish office no later than 15 days prior to you wedding
date. Please make sure that the
self-addressed envelope from the city or town is with the license.
9. Wedding Rehearsal:
Your Wedding Rehearsal should be held one or two
days before the date of the wedding. These are usually held between 5:00-7:00
p.m. Please schedule this with the
priest at least two months before your wedding date. Rehearsals are scheduled every 45 minutes, please
be certain that everyone attending the rehearsal is “on time”. Due to time constraints, all rehearsals will
begin at the scheduled time, even if all the participants are not present. The following are asked to be present at the
wedding rehearsal: Bride, Groom, Best Man, Maid/Matron of Honor, Ushers,
Bridesmaids, Bride and Grooms parents, and any others who will take part in the
ceremony (readers, etc.). Our wedding
coordinator, Stephen Fahrig, will be present for your rehearsal and will also
be at the church for the start of your wedding on the day of your
marriage.
A. Ushers: Ushers are asked to arrive at the Church 1/2
hour before the Wedding is scheduled to begin.
Ushers will be seating your guests during this time period.
B. Groom/Best Man: The Groom and Best Man are asked
to arrive at the Church 1/2 hour before the Wedding is to begin. They will remain in the sacristy until the
Wedding begins.
C. Bride/Maid of
Honor/Bridesmaids: The Bride, Maid of Honor, and Bridesmaids should arrive
outside the Church at least 10 minutes before the ceremony. The Bride should be inside the Church at
least 5 minutes before the wedding is scheduled to begin. It is extremely important that your wedding
begins at the scheduled time. When making
arrangements for transportation and
photographs at your homes and on the
Church steps please be aware of the time involved.
D. Readers: We encourage the participation of relatives
and friends as readers during your ceremony.
The first reading (Old Testament), second reading (New Testament), and
prayers of the faithful may be proclaimed by someone of your choice. We highly recommend that you choose someone
who is comfortable reading in public and has had some experience in public
speaking. Please be sure that your
readers know the meaning behind the words and will speak clearly and loudly.
E. Gift Bearers: The gifts of bread and
wine which will be
consecrated at Mass are sometimes
offered by the congregation. If you
wish, two relatives or friends may bring forward the gifts of bread and wine at
offertory time.
F. Confetti, Rice, Bubbles, Flower Petals: We must insist
that you request your guests to refrain from the throwing of rice, confetti,
bird seed, & blowing bubbles in church or on the steps of the church, etc... This is due to the danger of a person's
falling and being injured. In addition
there may be a Mass or another wedding scheduled after yours. There is no maintenance staff on duty on the
weekends.
G. Unity Candles: While the unity candle is a beautiful way for
the newly married couple to express their union in Marriage, it has not
traditionally been part of the Catholic ceremony. It can be a fire hazard and has resulted in
injury and property damage in the past.
For these reasons, unity candles may not be used in the church.
Those couples who would like to make the unity candle part of their wedding day
are encouraged to incorporate it into the reception.
H. Receiving Line: Receiving Lines are permitted after your
Wedding ceremony when there is no conflicting Mass
or Wedding ceremony immediately following.
Please inquire with the priest
handling your wedding for further
instructions on this matter.
I. Preparation to receive the
Holy Sacrament of Matrimony and Communion: All Catholics should be properly
disposed to receive the sacrament of Holy Matrimony and the Eucharist by
availing
themselves of the sacrament of
reconciliation before their wedding day.
Please consider the Sacrament of Penance before your
scheduled Wedding date.
J. Prayer at the Reception: In these days of fewer priests, the one who celebrates
your wedding might find it difficult, if not impossible, to attend your wedding
reception to celebrate with you and lead grace before the meal. The following grace prayer may be used at
your reception. We suggest that you
might ask a family member to lead the grace before the meal when a priest is
unavailable.
10. The Day of the Wedding Mass/Ceremony:
Be on time! Weddings are scheduled for a 1½ hour period. It is important to be aware of the time
constraints that the Church has in scheduling Weddings, Masses and other
liturgical celebrations. If there is a
Mass or other celebration scheduled after your Wedding and you are late, it may
be necessary to shorten your celebration so that the Church will be available
for the next
Marriage Preparation Checklist
Marriage
Date: _____________ Marriage Time:
_____________
Priest
Celebrant: _______________________
Marriage Preparation (Pre-Cana)
completed: __________
(preferably 6
months prior to the date of wedding)
Deposit to secure your wedding date, $250 ______
(within 30 days
of booking your wedding)
Baptismal
& Confirmation Certificate sent to priest: __________
(6 Months prior to your wedding date)
Organist
contacted & singer arranged: __________
(no later than 2
months prior to date of wedding)
Marriage
License received: __________
(60—15 days prior to your wedding date)
Rehearsal
Date: __________ Rehearsal Time:
__________
(book with priest
at least 2 months prior to wedding date)
Please present the following
items to the parish office no later than 15 days before your wedding date:
1. Selection sheet (filled out completely) from Together
For Life booklet.
2. Marriage
License granted by State(please include the envelope provided
by city/town)
3. Church
Donation (offering of $250 in separate envelope).
4. Wedding
Coordinator (Stephen
Fahrig)
fee ($75 in separate envelope). (Stephen Fahrig)
5. Altar
Server's Stipend ($10 each in separate envelopes).
6.Organist (Carolyn Martin) fee ($150 in
separate envelope)
7. Soloist
fee, if applicable ($125 in separate envelope)
Prayer of Blessing at Reception
Let us Pray…
Lord God, we thank you for all of your many gifts to us today, especially
the gift of
Married love and family and friends.
We ask you to send down your
blessing upon us gathered here
together.
In a special way, bless (Bride) and (Groom),
who today have been married.
Keep them always in your care.
Bless the food we eat, the conversation we share, and bless our lives with
your grace.
We ask this in the Name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy
Spirit. Amen.
The priests and staff of
St. Brigid Parish
and Gate of Heaven Parish
pray that you have a
Blessed Wedding Day
and beautiful life together
in Christ
These guidelines were
reviewed and approved
as of January 1, 2007